Its confirmed, I AM the tortoise!

Thanks to a whole lot of training, and support from so many wonderful friends, and others, I ran and finished my first ever distance race, the Scotiabank Toronto Waterfront half marathon on Sunday!!!!! Huge thanks to Coaches Rick and Jenna, and my running buddies, Sue and Kaye, and to the TNT alumni runners like Tracy, who shared tips and such in the post-Sunday morning run coffee chats. And to every one of my supporters, particularly those that took the time to send me text message cheers. You made me smile every time one appeared on my watch while I was running. The few that arrived near the end were super helpful in keeping my pace up.

So let me share the excitement of my first ever race event.

I arrived in Toronto on Saturday morning, and walked from the downtown airport to the race Expo. There I picked up my race kit and bib, and had a look around, as it was my first race expo. I met and talked with Cheryl from TNT for the first time in person while there. Then it was on to my hotel, where I had expected to have to wait to check in since it was WAY before 3pm, but I was lucky and they had a room for me, so I was able to check in right away when it was only just noon. I began by unpacking my gear and getting ready for the following day.

I pack light.

Back of shirt.

Have to have a bib shot.

I had a pasta dinner with TNT folks Saturday night, Lots from Toronto there, so when I arrived I took a table by myself, since they seemed to be in established groups. This turned out to be fine, as Coach Jenna and I were the only ones there from Ottawa, and we got the other out of town  folks at our table, which was the contingent from North Texas. They were really nice and friendly, and we hit it off well.

Now comes the point where I have to say one huge thank you to all of my supporters. TNT thanked us participants at the dinner, and I was lucky enough to be the top fundraiser for the event for TNT. I could not have done that without all of you. Together, we raised over $9000 for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society of Canada!!!! That's just awesome. I think Kerry would be very pleased. Our charity was also the top charity for the race!

I barely slept Saturday night, I was so wound up about the race. Again, not so much the running part, but whether I would remember everything I needed, and would I find my way about, and basically all the logistical stuff that was not the actual putting one foot in front of the other part. I finally got up before the alarm went off. It was just after 5 am. I proceeded to try and prepare my body for the event, mainly my feet. My baby toes have had recurring blisters pretty much every week for last few weeks after my long run. I hesitate to say they actually healed between runs, because I don't think they did. So I knew they were likely to be my Achilles heal. I did my best to protect them, and I was in great spirits and feeling very determined when I headed off to the race area at 7 am.

Sunday morning was cold. It was just 3 degrees Celcius when we met up at the TNT pavilion before the start of the race. I made a last minute decision to wear my sweatpants rather than check them for post race, instead checking my yoga pants. I was wearing a ditch-able fleece jacket, gloves, and a windbreaker, but needed the extra on my legs during the 1.5 hour wait between bag-check/ meet up time and the actual race start. It was definitely one of the coldest days I have ever run on. I basically had my TNT vest, shorts, and sleeves as my running attire. I knew once I started I would warm up, but the waiting part was just plain cold. Many were wearing garbage bags even though they had put on extra gear.

We headed as a group to the start corrals, after posing for group photos. I think there were like 45 of us, all in our TNT gear, even if some us did not have it visible due to jackets and garbage bags. :)  A few of us peeled off into the faster corrals, but most of us were in the last runner corral, the purple one, for the slower folks. I was fine with that. I AM slow. I certainly would not want to get in the way of faster folks. I mean, I figured I was going to be passed by some of  the walkers anyway :)

In the corral, we huddled together, using our collective heat to keep warm. As the start time approached, we ditched the more bulky items, like sweat pants and sweaters. I left my fleece and pants, and tried to think warm thoughts while dressed in just my shorts, TNT singlet, and thin windbreaker. I left on my gloves though. I bounced, and shivered, and as the minutes counted down to the start, I began to warm up just from excitement. Every time a corral ahead of us started, we got to move up. The announcers at the start were great at building the excitement, and making even those of us in the slow purple corral feel special.

Finally, it was our time, and the slowest of the runners, myself among them, took off under the start banner, our chip timers beginning their count as our bibs crossed over the timer mats. People were cheering us on, shaking their cowbells, and blowing whistles and horns. It was very inspiring.

I had my race plan to follow, so while everyone took off rather quickly, and people were passing me to either side, I settled into my planned pace- a slow and steady 8:30min/km. I was hoping to finish in 3 hours or maybe even a couple of minutes under that, but this was the farthest I had ever run, and I mainly wanted to finish it, more than meeting a specific time. So I let the other runners pass me. And then some of the faster walkers too. I was smiling and enjoying the experience.

Proof that I was smiling a lot.

I tried not to really think about the route. I knew that I would not get lost, and I did not really want to focus on how far I had gone, or how far I had left to go. I wanted to just run, and take in the crowds cheering, and what it felt like to run with so many other people around. I had a small taste of that at the Terry Fox fun run I did, but that was NOTHING compared to being one of something like 20000 people all running the same course with you.

It was nice to see so many cheering despite how cold it was, and that I was at the back, with the bulk of the runners well ahead of me. They could have gone inside and left us slow folks to run without cheers, but many did not do that. The drink stations were well staffed and equipped, and I always managed to get a drink. I was glad I had decided to walk through the stations, as the pavement was slick with Gatorade and water and discarded cups, and I saw more than one person around me slip, or trip a bit, on them. But I did not walk for long, and I went back to my slow run as soon as the debris lessened.

I loved the first part, with its slow downhill, and the residential area and shops. We ran past the medal landmark for this year's event, Honest Eds. That was neat. I loved the school that had its cheerleaders out with their pom poms, doing cheers as we ran by. I loved the folks sitting on their porches in their winter coats, some with pets and small kids, who cheered us on. I loved the many wacky signs  that were being held up to encourage and motivate us. I loved the cheer station from one of the radio stations that was blasting some excellent reggae music that had me dance run past them.

Then it was onto Lake Shore. It was still cold. I only removed my gloves around 6 km in. I was still in my windbreaker. This stretch of the course was not as visually interesting, and I mainly relied on my music to carry my feet along. At the 10 km mark, I was doing well, pace just shy of my goal, at 8:37/km. I tried to go a bit faster after that, but there were fewer folks cheering, and it was still cold. Still I was happy to be out there, and I really do think I had a smile on my face the whole time. When the smile started to fade from the cold, I just added in a bit of dance to my tunes, and that picked my feet up again, along with my lips. I finally managed to remove my coat somewhere around the 15 km mark. By the time I entered into the final stretch, up the hill of Bay street, the wind was whipping down the street, and I almost put it back on again.

I know that Kerry was running with me as I passed 18 km, and was into the farthest I have ever run stretch, the last 3.1 km to the finish line. I was still smiling.

Last 100m, trying to forget the blister.

My toes were aching around 19 kms. I took an unplanned walk break for a bit around 20 kms, naturally right before coach Jenna shows up to run with me. I KNEW that would happen. LOL. But she got me back running, and I was managing about 8:00/km pace with her in the last km. I was still smiling at that point, with about 400 m to go, right about when Jenna had to peel off to go encourage her next TNT runner, when the reason for my aching toes became instantly apparent. A blister broke on my left baby toe. As I described to others, the pain was intense, as sweat and broken blister met. I saw through space and time. I am sure I was not smiling then. I kept going though, still running, as I was so close to the finish. Another TNT coach, Katie, met me with 300 m to go and ran with me to within 100 m of the finish line. At that point, I pulled on my love of Kerry, and recalled all he went through. The thoughts made me strong enough to push aside my trivial pain. I had experienced a far greater pain than a mere blister. And I had experienced a far greater love and joy. I recalled both, and pulled on the joy that was loving Kerry. I sprinted (well, ok, it was a sprint for me anyways :) ) to the finish line. I wanted to end the race strong, just as Kerry had remained strong through all he went through.

I was smiling then, as I crossed the finish.  Here is the proof.

Crossing the finish.

My chip time was 3:01:42.  I was the Tortoise. But like the Tortoise, I finished the race. Not quite last, but definitely at the back of the pack. I do not care. I FINISHED!!!

OVERALL PLACE	10236/10528
GENDER PLACE	5402/5619
CATEGORY PLACE	450/471

OVERALL PLACE

10236/10528

GENDER PLACE

5402/5619

CATEGORY PLACE

450/471

I continued to smile for the rest of the day, I think.  A friend, on seeing some of these images, asked me why I was smiling so much, wasn't running 20k supposed to be hard work? My reply was that I smiled because of why I was doing it, and I smiled because I could.

Smiling at TNT post race check-in

Still smiling at my hotel later.

I never once forgot that I was running this for Kerry.

And George.    

And Patrick.     

And Anthony.    

And Lyne.    

And Little Sam.     

And everyone who has survived the battle with blood cancer, is still fighting it, or who did not win.  

Every one of them was in my mind as I ran.     

And every one of them was in my heart as I finished.   

They are the real heroes.

It's Time.

Here we are, just a day away from the race!!!! I had hoped to post something after doing my 18k run (which went well, by the way), but I have been so busy with life and training and preparing for the event and the coming of winter, that this is the first chance I've had to sit and write.

So yes, I did my first 15k long run a few weeks ago. I was slow, but I made it through. Then I did another 10k at split pace, and that felt longer than the 15k for whatever reason. Some days are good days and others not so much. Then I did the 18k run, and apart from some butt cramping in the final kilometer, it went well. I had a good pace (~8:45min/km average) and felt good. I was in my race day apparel and gear, and did the whole nine yards for prep (taping pressure points on feet, using body glide, etc.) to make it as close to a dry run of race day as possible. My plan is to run between water stations (about every 3km) and walk for 100-200m as I pass the water stations and drink. This will break the race into smaller chunks. I have my Stinger's Chews for energy and electrolyte replacement, and will have a bag of those 45-60 minutes, again what I have been practicing during long runs. I have never gotten into the gel stuffs, and I like the chews for ease of use and that I can munch on them over a longer duration (one bag lasts me up to 10km! hehehe It's like a reward every km!)

I know I will finish. The only questions are in what shape and in what time, and those go hand in hand and can't be answered in advance. :) I have prepped the best I can. Now I rely on adrenaline, my fellow runners, those cheering us on, and luck, to determine the specifics of my finish. :) I have even provided my sponsors and friends with a way to send me remote cheers as I run. I will make good use of hubby's smart watch that he barely got to use before he passed away. Plus, its a little bit of him that will be with me while I run, as it has been since I first strapped it on my wrist in April. Folks can also follow my progress via http://www.sportstats.ca/ .  My bib number for the Scotiabank Toronto Waterfront Half Marathon is 12335.

Kerry has been on my mind frequently of late. As race day approaches, I can't help but wish he was here to see me do this, waiting for me at the finish reunification area to hug my sweaty self and congratulate me. I wish I could hug him back and tell him how he inspired me, and gave me the courage and reason to run. Yet in a weird way, I know I could never have done this if he were still here. He always used to undermine my resolve on exercising and food. Not out of any malice or intent. It's just he was not a morning person for exercise and would always ask me to stay a while longer before getting up. Or he would be out somewhere and see some treat that he knew I liked and he'd bring it home for me, and of course, he loved his chips and such so they were always in the house, tempting me.  In truth, I loved his sweetness in both of these gestures, but it did make consistent exercise and diet difficult. Still, I miss him and wish he could see what I have accomplished these past many months. I will readily admit that I have cried more again in these last few weeks, thinking about the whys and reasons, and the passage of time. While I don't have anyone going with me outside of my fellow TNTers, even if friends or family were go with me, I'd still feel alone, because Kerry is still the main person I want to be there for me.

There is a part of me that believes he still walks beside me however. A part that says he is watching over me, and will be with me during my race. I hear his voice in my head, teasing me and encouraging me in his usual sarcastic way. This part of me knows he knows I do this in his honor, and that he is proud of me. So while I miss his actual presence, I feel that he will be with me in some way. Like everything since he passed away, it's not the way I want it to be, but it's what I now have.

I have been obsessing about what to bring with me to Toronto for the race, and worrying whether I will remember to pack it all. I have had a list going for more than a week now, and have been putting things aside for the last week. I think I am more anxious about this aspect than the running itself. While VISA can get me out of trouble should I forget something, it won't be the tried and true broken in something that will ensure my success :)  I am sure I will be in full on panic before I am done the packing tonight. Hopefully I manage to get some sleep, as I am not sure how much I will get tomorrow night in the hotel.

The forecast at the moment is for a cool day in Toronto, with some sun. This sounds ideal, at least for me. I will still be racing in my vest and shorts, as I get hot when I run. However, the waiting for an hour and a half or more before I start running is yet another thing to plan for. I have a cheap jacket I will wear and toss when I get warm, but do not have the same for my legs, not having found anything suitable for that purpose. So I guess I will wear a garbage bag skirt before the race to stay warm and toss it right as I start. I have gloves to toss when I get warm too. My sleeves I will just roll down onto my wrists if I need to. I also have planned for some post-race warm clothes, since even on hot days I get the chills for half an hour to an hour shortly after I cool down from the effort. Now, the blankets they give out at the finish of a longer race make a lot of sense.

(That's 49/40°F for reference)

 

Saucony Xodus 5.0 GTX

Ronhill Womens Vizion Winter Tight

As I mentioned earlier, I have signed up for the Tinkerbell Half Marathon in May. This means I have incentive to run over the winter. I think fate has been telling me this is what I am supposed to be doing, as when I was in COSTCO the other day they had some long-sleeved Adidas tops for $3.97. So I picked up several. Then, when I went into RunningRoom to get my socks for race day and the Body Glide, they happened to have some RonHill Winter Tights on sale. They just had 2 pair, and both fit me. They were on for half price, at just $45 each. So I picked those up too. Then, since obviously I am supposed to keep running based on these steals, I decided I better get some shoes too. After trying on a few waterproof ones, I settled on the Saucony Xodus 5.0 GTX. They have a good tread and should handle some snow, as well as being waterproof. The only things left to get are some gators if I plan to actually run in snow rather than on plowed/packed snow, and some sort of outer layer. I am thinking the outer layer will make a nice Christmas gift to me from someone, so will put that on my list.





Okay, moving on before my mind contemplates a Christmas without Kerry....

Stats. I have to give a final update on the stats for this endeavor. Not that my running is over, but the training for THIS event of it is, aside from one last 45min run I will be doing right after this. So you can add that time and another ~5k to these for my final stats before the race.

Count:	95 Activities
Distance:	515.15 km
Calories:	37,064 C
Time:	83:17:23 h:m:s
Avg Distance:	5.42 km
Avg Speed:	6.2 km/h
Max Avg Speed:	7.2 km/h
Avg HR:	135 bpm
Steps:	592,256 s
Avg Run Cadence:	62 spm
Max Run Cadence:	123 spm

I have lost about 25 pounds, give or take 1-2 depending on the day, since Kerry passed away, with more than half of that since starting to run.  So I am still a heavy 167-170 pounds. I had hoped I might lose more, but what can I say? I love food. Like the Oatmeal, I think being able to eat what I like is one of the perks of running, in my opinion. :)   So maybe weight loss for me will be more gradual than others might experience. Still, I hope to cut back a bit over the winter, when I will train a bit less intensely, and hopefully I will come into the spring and the increased training for the Tinkerbell with a few more pounds shed.

To the fundraising, my total is now at over $9000. Some of that was me. I had heard from several other fundraisers that many people do not like donating when the event in question has minimums that participants have to raise, which go to covering the participant's support by the organizaton, in this case things like our coaches, race entrance fee, training/race day shirts, and support on injury prevention, nutrition, and fundraising. So I vowed that I would cover my minimum fundraising commitment myself, at the end. Its part of the reason I picked something close to home with a lower minimum. The other part was that the lower the minimum, it felt like more of what I would raise/contribute would go to the cause. I had no idea going into this what amounts I might raise, and my inital goal was just $2500.  Some people may do these sort of charity runs as opportunities to run somewhere exotic with less out of pocket to themselves, but that's not for me. Even if I were to pick a more distant race, I would still cover the minimum commitment amount needed myself.

So off I go for one last pre-race run. Tomorrow I fly to Toronto, and will pick up my race kit and bib, and see a bit of the race expo (not too much as I don't want to tire my legs!). This will be followed by a TNT pasta dinner after I check into my hotel. Then I will try and get some sleep. Sunday morning it will be up at the ass-crack of dawn to get prepped. Eat my small usual breakfast of a bagel and peanut butter (bringing it with me so I know its my usual!). Apply protection to my feet (I found some nice thin fabric bandages that cover nicely and stay put).  Glide up my body where I might get chafed. Then with my bag of post race gear in hand, I will head to the start area and check in my bag before meeting up with the ~40-50 other TNT folks that will be racing on Sunday with me. Most are from Toronto, but I am told some will be up from Texas! I will get to meet many of them Saturday night, but all of us are to meet up at 7:45am Sunday morning before we head en masse to the start corrals. At 9:05am, those of us in the purple corral, myself and the other runners who are the slowest apart from the walkers, will get to go. I hope to finish in 3 hours, but I will take a finish at any time before the 3 hour and 50 minute cutoff. And in any shape.

Like this woman, for instance.

I am excited, nervous, sad, elated, and a whole host of other emotions.

Wish me luck.




Kerry, this race, and all the effort I have given it, is for you. I love you baby, and I am getting in shape like you wanted me to. You are my inspiration. After everything you went through, and the strength and courage you demonstrated, this does not even compare. Hopefully my efforts give some meaning to everything you endured. In a weird way, its been helping me cope with the loss of you. You are the reason I run. Or rather, the lack of you.

One Month To Go

So. If any reading this want to contribute to my fundraising, we are in the final 3 weeks of the campaign. Oct 7, 2014 is the deadline. This time next month, my race will be done, and I will be soaking sore muscles and eating rich foods! I am getting nervous and excited now. Things are coming together, and the reality of what I am doing has hit home. Not that I fear I can't do this- quite the opposite! I have done 12k runs so far, and this weekend will be my first 15k run. I have done interval training. I have done a split pace 10k. There have been more opportunities for learning, and each has helped prepare me.

Belleisle Marsh Trail (near the start)

Over the Labour Day weekend, I took a trip home to NS to visit my parents. I had to do a long run and an interval training day while there. Not wanting to run on the roads (was not sure about traffic and condition of the shoulders) I instead ran on some trails. This was actually quite enjoyable. However trail running is not the same as running on pavement. The first trail was my 10K run, and it was pretty, but not super maintained. The trail was essentially a tractor path through a nice wetlands area, so while there was some gravel and dirt bits, there were also narrow ruts, rocks, and a lot of overgrown grass that liked to catch my shoes. Never once did my foot land in a nice even position, and it was a lot of work on my legs. However, I can't see that as a bad thing!  The interval day trail was shorter, again around a wetland pond, and I had to do laps of it. It was better maintained, and more gravel covered. It was a very good session. That was the good learning.

French Basin Trail

French Basin Trail

On arriving home I discovered a had a few blisters on my feet. The ones I found were on my heel and top of one of my toes, and I thought not much of them, thinking it was the still newish non-running shoes I had worn during my trip. I tried to go for my Thursday run the next day and had to abort. The balls of my feet were so sore!  Of course, I get back home and find blisters there too. So I cleaned them and bandaged them up, and did not run that day or the next day. They felt and looked better on Sunday, so I went out for my long run of 12k. By about 7k  I noticed them again. By 9k I was walking. They felt like bruises on the bottom of my feet and every foot strike was getting rather painful. So I walked for about a km, sort of on the sides of my feet. When the pain felt less, I finished the run running. I got home and fixed them up even better. I was able to run fine by Thursday, and no more issue since then. I now believe they may have started with the trail running, with its rocks and uneven surfaces, and the newish shoes just were the straw that broke the blisters back.

3/4 of Team Kerry

One of Kerry's co-workers formed a team in his memory for the 2014 Terry Fox Run, which was last Sunday. Of course, I had to participate once I learned of it.  My two running buddies registered too. It was a cool day-- 9 degrees C-- but perfect otherwise, and once I started running, even the coolness was welcome. The run fell on my split pace long run day, so that's what I did.  I managed 9min/km pace for first 5k and 8min/km for second. New PBs for 1 mi (12:18), 5k (39:59) and 10k (1:28:50)- the last two being each 2 minutes faster than previous times !!!! There was also some walking in both segments (once while waiting for buddy to use facilities and once when passing the finish area because the marked course was NOT 10km and I had to keep going but was throngs of folks and cars to get around). All in all a good day.
  
I have missed a few more days of running with the blisters and a few late days at work and the need to catch the lawn mowing between the rains. However, I think training is still on track and I am feeling good about being able to do the 21.1k on Oct 19. Starting to think about what I will be wearing, planning for a few different weather contingencies. I want to try to run with that gear for my next few long runs, so that I know it will be okay come race day. My race day shirt should be here in the next few days, so I can wash it a few times and decorate it, and basically break it in a bit.

Now for the stats, because you can't really see my progress in person, can you? Well, I have been holding steady still on the weight, despite hoping a few more pounds would drop off at some point. However, that's okay as I don't want to set myself up for failure at the race. I have put in some good training so far!

     Count:                82 Activities
     Distance:           410.12 km
     Calories:            31,073 C
     Time:                67:24:21 h:m:s
     Avg Distance:    5.00 km
     Avg Speed:        6.1 km/h
     Max Avg Spd:    7.1m/h
     Avg HR:            135 bpm
     Steps:              467,618 s

My concentration issues are getting better, although I am still too easily distracted for my liking. However, I have been able to focus much better in last month, both at work and in leisure. I have read a few more books now, and I have had some longer gaming session on the consoles/computer too. I am not there yet, but am feeling more like myself than I have in half a year. This is both a good thing, and something that bothers me. Part of me wonders, if I am getting better, does that mean I will forget? Rationally I know I won't, but such is the grief thought process.

Over half a year. Yes, its now been 7 months since Kerry passed away. As I write that, I am shaking my head in disbelief. It still seems so surreal at times. Time really has gotten messed up since his death. Sometimes it crawls along, barely moving. Then, at times like this, realizing that its been 7 months, it seems like it has passed at warp speed. I am coping, and I even can enjoy myself. I have gotten to a point where I can be me now without that seeming like a prison sentence. That does not mean the pain is not still there though. It just means I have gotten more used to it, and am more adept at functioning with it.  As others have said, you don't get over the loss of your lover and partner; you simply learn to live despite it.

Half Way

Its been a busy month and a bit since my last blog. Lots has been happening on all fronts, but finally a chance to get something written here.

So, lets start with the not so great things of the last month, and work to the good stuff.  First off, mid July had the first of the 'first' dates that I have to get through following Kerry's death- our anniversary. It would have been 26 years. I knew the day would hit me hard, and I prepared by booking the day off work. What I was not prepared for was that it was hard for about a week leading in to it and out of it as well. A definite low period for me, and probably the most depressed I've been since he died. However, with a lot of tissues, and some good people to talk to, I made it through. Next up will be his birthday, then Christmas.

Had a few more aches in the legs during that same period. I actually had to take one running day off, to see if the pain would abate. It did, so that was good. I think it was a combination of running more (now 4 days a week, and farther long runs), doing the repeated oval of track days, and my shoes actually wearing to the point they needed replacing. At any rate, after a sore-ish month, I think with the change of shoes, and muscles adjusting to the added activity, have finally combined to work for me, as the pain has been subsiding.

Worn Shoes

New shoes

 I went on my first solo trip as well, not far, just to Toronto to play tourist and take in a concert. I was supposed to run from the island airport to my hotel, and then back, to get in my weekly runs. However, I found I can not (yet) run with a backpack on. So I walked instead. Did 5.5km each way, so distance was good, but still missed the actual running workouts.

I have also discovered some of the less pleasant aspects of running. One of the track days happened to fall on one of our hottest days this summer, about 31 celcius before humidex. Track days are a harder workout, being as they are not "easy" pace but faster ones, plus we do some strength exercises before hand. Although I had been drinking water, my body decided it did not like the heat, and I must have had the start of a heat exhaustion. All I know is that I had to make a pretty dang fast 100m dash from where I was in my laps to the track bathroom, where I basically spent something like 15 min. After that, I could not run, and was still cramping something awful. I could  not risk driving for another half hour or so, for fear I would not make it my 40min drive home.

I also had my first major cramp while running. I've had a few where I caught them as they began, and I was able to walk them out, but last Sunday (10th)  I was supposed to run for 75 min, and in last 10min, my right calf just completely seized. I almost fell face first on the pavement since it was the leg taking my weight at the time. I stretched it, and had to walk the last bit of my run, hobbling somewhat, and the calf remained sore for pretty much all that week, even with massaging and stretching. One of the TNT alumni runners who still runs from the same coffee shop, met up with us as I was stretching the calf, and he suggested I need to start bringing electrolytes along now that I am going for more than an hour.

That's the bad. However, each was a learning experience, so here are some of the takeaways that I got from each.

1. I likely don't want to have nothing to do over the next "first" or subsequent ones. So I will plan to do something special for me. I did do a movie on our anniversary, but I needed to have a plan for the days around the date as well. So now I will look to maybe get away over Christmas to keep busy.
2. Keep an eye on the wear of my shoes, as perhaps the "estimated" wear distance is not going to be close to actual for me, given that I still weigh a bit more. I have already ordered 2 more pairs of my shoes, to be ready to change them at the first signs of leg pains again.
3. Once I get done my event, I will start running with a backpack more often, empty to start and building up weight. Its useful to run while I am doing the tourist thing. Or errands.
4. Prepare for hot days by being well hydrated PRIOR to the running, and bring electrolyes.
5. Prepare for the longer runs by being well hydrated, and having electrolyes along.

Now onto the things that are going well. My fundraising re-commitment has come and gone, and I am fully committed now for the Scotiabank Toronto Waterfront half marathon!. I have surpassed my minimum fundraising amount, and am doing very well, being among the top 3 fundraisers in Canada right now. I am very pleased with how everyone has rallied behind me for this cause! If you have not yet contributed, there is still time- just click on the fundraising goal image to go to my secure site where you can make a donation via credit card.

This past month has seen the addition of track training to my schedule. I usually have to do a slightly modified version of the session the coach has planned, because all his athletes come out to track days, not just us TNT folks, and some of his clients are pretty darn fast folk, and some marathoners. So sometimes the track session plan would be as far as I have done on my easy long runs, so would be a real challenge to complete at faster paces LOL.  However, they do seem to help with my speed, and I have had some faster long run paces since starting the track interval training. I have set new PBs for 1km, 1mi, and 5k since starting track training. These are still not fast, but since I have been doing at least 5km for more than just last month, it shows that the speed is improving.

I also added some training buddies to my long runs. Since our TNT group is so small, its often just me, which is lonely and not very motivating. Thankfully, my friend S stepped up to the plate, and a friend of a friend, K, has also been coming out. Both are faster than me, but they go slower for me, although still usually a bit faster than I might do on my own. This is a good thing as it pushes me a bit past my comfort zone! Its nice to have the company along for sure.

Today, I had added another milestone, with the completion of my first 10km run. Training is just chugging right along, and we are just 2 months away now from the race. Its more than half way since I signed up with Team in Training, and almost half way in the training, and also just about half way in the distance I have achieved. I feel pretty confident that so long as I keep with the training per the plan, I will be finishing my first half marathon in two months.Right now, I'd say it will be in just over 3 hours.I won't have run 21.1km prior to race day; I think I will have done 18. So just as it is any time I do a new distance, my goal to to go nice and easy and get it done. If I have anything left in me, the last km or so will be where I give it.  I did use some electrolyte/energy chews for the first time today, and whether it was those, the cool sunny day, or the new shoes, but it was a great run. I felt energized and just good.

Concentration is still slowly improving, but I do think it is getting better. I was able to read my first book since hubby passed away, which for someone who used to go through anywhere from 3-8 books a month, well, taking 5 months to finish one book just had never happened before.

My physical stats have not changed much if at all since last month. Still the same weight, and such. However, I do eat more as well. I am definitely hungrier now that I run :)  Perhaps over the winter as I ease back a bit on the running, I can cut back on the eating too and trim down some more. However, I can't stop running, as I committed myself to a race in May. This one is just for me and my late husband. His favorite Disney character was Tinkerbell, so as soon as I heard of the Tinkerbell Half, I knew I had to run it :) So I signed up for it as soon as registration opened. I will have to step up the training come February latest, but I can ease up a after my race till then. Besides, its a nice excuse for a vacation in May to California heheh.

As to actual running and training stats, 

     Count:                70 Activities
     Distance:           324.86 km
     Calories:            25,624 C
     Time:                54:25:42 h:m:s
     Avg Distance:    4.64 km
     Avg Speed:        6.0 km/h
     Max Avg Spd:    6.6 km/h
     Avg HR:            136 bpm
     Steps:              366,628 s

Tomorrow will be 6 months since Kerry left this world. Its still an oddity of grief that this feels to me like both the longest time ever, and also like it was just yesterday. I still love him and miss him, and not a day goes by that I don't think of him, or talk to him. I hope that where ever he is now, he is pleased that I am hanging in there, coping, and continuing to live.

Slow and Steady

I am the Tortoise.

So here we are, another month since my last update, and three months since I started the actual physical part of this journey. Official coached training has begun, and things are moving along now. Today I had a group training session, and we ran an out and back route down Preston Street and the along the canal for a bit. I was a little nervous about my planned session, being as its the longest (and farthest!) I have ever run in my life. One hour of running, but split into four 15 minute segments to give me a chance to rest in between (3-4 minutes, no more), which I still need :).  I managed to keep my running pace close to 9 min/km, which is of course barely faster than walking. However, that's what I have to do currently if I want to go the time/distance. As my body becomes more used to this, perhaps I will be able to speed up. Today ended up at  just over 7.5 kms, which is pretty much one third of what I will do come race day. However, as I said going into this, I have no real expectations for my first half marathon (and my first distance race of any kind ever) beyond finishing it before the cutoff time. No pressure is how I plan to keep it. At least for this event. Who knows for the future.

When the coaching began, I was up to 6 min run intervals. The first assigned runs from the coach were 10 minute intervals-- three of them, with four of them on my first Sunday "long run".  I was intimidated, but determined. To my surprise, I did them. Then it was 2 x 15 minute runs and I did them too. Then was today's run, as mentioned above, and next week I do 2 x 20 minutes, with the plan of 2 x 30 minutes for next Sunday. Given that it took me almost 3 months to get from 1 minute of running to 6 minutes, and even then we are talking totals of only about 18-20 minutes of run time in a workout, jumping to 10 minutes with a total of 30 or more for the session seemed like an incredible leap. However, there is nothing to do but try. And as Yoda says, there is no try, only do or do not. So I did. I aim to keep my mind open, my body cared for, and maybe I will continue to surprise myself.

Given that its summer here, finally, I have switched to running mostly in the mornings, trying to catch the cooler part of the day. There have still been a few mornings though that were humid and warm. I almost wished the skies had opened up with full on rain, but it has not rained during my runs since the weather warmed up. I never used to understand people out running in the rain, but now I totally get it. I think I will love running best in the fall and into (and maybe through!) winter. At rest, I am a typical woman, meaning that I usually feel cold all the time, and want to wear sweaters and blankets once the fall and winter come, and even in the summer in air conditioned malls and offices. I barely ever sweated, and could often go without a deodorant.  Now that I am running, this has changed. It seems I run hot. I sweat copious amounts and need to drink water frequently. This is just wonderful (sarcasm) on the hot humid days. Now, I can wear tank tops and shorts and still feel warm even at rest. The exception is for about an hour, after I cool down following a run. Then I tend to get chills. Go figure. All I can say is that between the sweating, the sun screen, and the bug repellent, I really look forward to jumping in the pool or shower when I get done a workout.

On a side note, in relation to bugs, they have been fierce this year. I have been diligent about wearing the spray to keep them at bay every time I go outdoors for a run or yard work. However, I washed my car one night, and while I did use some, I guess I get a little splash happy with the hose when I am washing my car or something, as when I got done, I had numerous bites on my exposed legs, which is basically from just above the knee down to my ankles. This would not have been so bad, except my body does not do well with lots of bites, and essentially takes an allergic reaction. So the next morning, not only did I have itchy bug bites, but also an awful case of hives, that extended even onto my feet.. This was about 3 weeks ago now.  I have been using anti-histamines and creams and such ever since to keep the itching down, but I have still managed to scratch my legs. A lot. So right now, I have all kinds of scabby bites all down my legs. I can hide them while I go to work, and have been, but not so much when I run since I am wearing shorts. Also, I have to say that sweat and bug spray are great at irritating them even more, and when I am done a run its all I can do not to take a scouring pad to my legs. hehheh. So, next time I want to wash the car, I will do it in full pants, and still coat myself in repellent LOL.  For now, I just hope my legs will eventually heal up, and I can stop fielding questions about what happened to them when I am out on my runs.

"I love these shoes"
http://www.patthompsonsmudgepaintinggallery.com/

I am still loving my shoes. The rest of my gear is also working, so no complaints or issues to date. My right knee gave a few twinges today- this is a knee I have twisted (pretty severely)  twice over the last 15 years or so, so I will keep tabs on it, and pull out a brace if I need to. I am hopeful that as I continue this, and maybe lose a bit more weight, that it won't bother me too much. Now that I am going for a bit longer at a time, I am feeling the effort in a few more leg muscles. Nothing that concerns me, just the tired aches of several of them saying hello (or perhaps its more of a "hello, what the &@%$ are you doing?" ).

I don't like eating too much before I run, unless I get up a good hour or more before I head out, which apart from weekends is just about never. What I will have is half a container of Boost/Ensure.  Its light and does not make me feel full, but seems to give me enough of something to keep me going.  When I have time, I will have a bagel and maybe some juice. I have been cautioned on not having dairy before a run, so I will keep that in mind and switch my cream cheese for some peanut butter from now on.  Once I am done my run, then I usually feel hungry and can have my usual breakfast (oatmeal on weekdays, something with eggs on weekends). Overall, I think I have been consuming more than I used to eat, and my weight is still slowly dropping. Others are saying they notice a difference in my body, but I still don't really see it. Maybe my face is a bit thinner. Otherwise, my belly is still jiggling like a bowl of jello, and the undersides of my upper arms still catch the breeze like good spinnakers. LOL.

On the stats front, my weight is hovering between 171 and 175 pounds, depending on the day. My body fat is at 36%, and my BMI now reads as 28.9. So these numbers are saying that at least some aspects of my fitness are improving. I can feel it in how I don't get winded anymore when I go up the three flights of stairs at work, and how I am able to run for longer periods but my heart rate is keeping lower than max now (unless I push my pace heheh).  More interesting stats might be those of the workouts. I basically started in April, when I signed up with TNT. As of today, let's look at some of the cool stats for what I have actually done:

Count:                    49 Runs
Distance:                193.90 km
Calories:                 15,301 C
Time:                     31:59:25 h:m:s
Avg Distance:         3.96 km
Steps:                    201,266 s
Avg Speed:             6.1 km/h
Max Avg Speed: 6.6 km/h
Avg HR:                136 bpm

Otherwise, my concentration and memory are very slowly improving, I think. It still bothers me that I am not as I was before Kerry passed away. However, I remind myself to be patient, and not be too hard on myself. It will take as long as it takes. Since I am still grieving, and still cry and miss him, I guess I can't expect my mental health to be on the mend yet. I am still thankful for the running, as it really is one of the only times I can turn off the brain and just be.

Fundraising has stalled, which I expected. I did send out some letters to some of the businesses we frequented, and I continue to send reminders via my Facebook and Twitter, but given that I exceeded my initial goals, I am still very pleased with what folks have donated for this endeavor. I am not the type to hound people for cash, and I am not going to go door to door, or hold my hand out at some store. Nor am I prepared to stage a more involved fundraising event. At least, not this time. I simply don't have the time, or the desire in me, to do so. I am still adjusting to a routine without Kerry, and trying to figure out how to get all the needed work/chores done and still have time for running, gaming/TV, and seeing friends. So far I can fit in any 3 in a week, which means something gets left out. Since running is only going to take up more time as we go forward, I will have to work on efficiency in other areas so that I do not slip to even fewer things in a week.